


The One That I Love

by Avistella



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bodyswap, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Reader Is Not MC, Reader-Insert, Takes place after Zen's Normal End, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2017-01-03
Packaged: 2018-09-06 04:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8734642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avistella/pseuds/Avistella
Summary: For the entirety of the eleven days you spent planning the RFA party, you were stuck in some other woman’s body. Having returned to your previous body after the party, you go to see Zen, but…





	1. Who Am I?

You stare at the reflection in the mirror before you, frowning. The movements of the reflection matched your actions, but the person reflected wasn't _you_. At least, not physically. This wasn't your body. That long chocolate brown hair. Those golden eyes. That fair and flawless skin. Even your height and shape of your body didn't match this cage of flesh that you now wore. This isn't _you_. Even if you weren't fond of certain aspects about your "previous" appearance, it was how you physically identified yourself, so you couldn't help but feel conflicted towards this new skin.

"Babe, are you okay in there?" you heard Zen's concerned voice come from the other side of the bathroom door, snapping you back to reality. Was this really reality though? It didn't feel like it, considering how out of touch you were with your own "body".

"Yes, I—" you stopped and cleared your throat. Even your voice was completely different. You remember being stunned speechless the first time you heard it when you answered a call. Since then, you've tried avoiding talking too much. There was a sense of fear that the more you took notice of the differences between this "new" body and your "old" one, the more you would lose your mind. "I'm fine."

Giving one last glance towards your—correction, _the_ —reflection, you opened the bathroom door, revealing a very worried looking Zen. You blinked in surprise, not expecting him to still be standing there. Upon seeing your face— _your_? Are you sure about that?—the actor's expression changed to one of youthful glee.

"I'm glad; I was a bit worried since you've been in there for a long time," Zen breathed out a sigh of relief. He had seen some of the signs. It wasn't hard to read between the lines of your cynical sense of humour towards your appearance, nor was it easy to ignore the marks that decorated your arms. Without a doubt, Zen was worried, but he wasn't sure if you would be comfortable talking about whatever was weighing on your mind. The first time the actor pointed out your arm, you had backed away so quickly, your face twisting to one of absolute fear and dread.

In the end, the young man chose to stay quiet, waiting for when you would be ready to talk with him. He cursed his own arrogance for thinking that the two of you were even close enough to talk about such personal matters. After all, you've only exchanged words via phone, and this was the first time the two of you even met in person. Zen decided to take things slowly, but that didn't stop him from offering reassurances here and there that he would listen to whatever you would have to say, hoping to close the gap.

You lowered your head, feeling guilty for making him worry about you, "Sorry."

"Ah, no! You don't need to apologize! Really!" Zen frantically waved his hands in a dismissive manner, trying to reassure you that everything was fine. He nervously scratched one of his cheeks that have significantly warmed up from embarrassment. You couldn't help but smile at the sight. Zen was such a pleasure to chat with on the messenger, but you never expected him to be _this_ adorable in person. As guilty as you were to admit it, you were kind of thankful that Zen broke his ankle, giving you this opportunity to finally meet face-to-face.

"How's your ankle?" you ask, deciding to change the subject.

The actor shrugs as much as his crutches allow him to and responds, "I think it's better now, to be honest. But I have to wait until the doctor gives the okay to remove it."

You smile at him warmly as the long bangs you tried to keep out of your face fall in front of your eyes, almost obscuring them. You give a frustrated huff at the annoyance, and Zen laughs as he goes to brush them away. "Thanks," you mutter as the actor's hand lingers near your face.

"I think you'd look nice if you cut your bangs shorter," Zen suggests, and you hold your tongue to say that it isn't your body to mess with. Well, you did think that, but you _did_ leave marks the first time you've had enough of this new body. It was only after looking at the mess did you realize that this body surely must have belonged to someone else.

So instead, you laugh, albeit a slightly strained one as you stare down at the floor, "Do you think so?"

Zen nods, gently placing his fingers underneath your chin, tilting your face up so that you're staring into his eyes. Hesitatingly, he takes one step closer towards you and watches your reaction. He doesn't want to make you uncomfortable and tries to respect your personal space, and when you don't move away, still staring at him, he feels relieved. Admittedly, having you stare at him so intently makes the actor blush slightly, and he almost wants to look away from embarrassment. _Almost_. He's far too entranced by your eyes to take his own off of them.

The young man finally decides to answer your question. "Yeah. That way, I can stare at your eyes more. They're gorgeous, just like the rest of you."

For a brief second, your heart flutters at his words before you realize that it isn't your eyes he's talking about, and you flinch, taking a step back. Immediately, Zen thinks he did something wrong and apologizes. You shake your head at him, unable to find your voice as your vision starts to blur. Both you and Zen mentally curse for different reasons as soon as you both realize that you're crying, and before Zen could move to comfort you, you ran back to the bathroom. You stayed there, crying, while Zen tried to talk to you from the other side of the door, desperately apologizing if he did or said something to offend you.

 _He's too kind_. He's too kind towards you, thinking you were some pretty-looking woman when in reality, you— You bite back another sob when you remember _who_ you actually were and what you looked like before. There was no way Zen would love you if you were in your other body...would he?

After having calmed down and fixed yourself up, you leave the washroom and reassure Zen that you're fine and that he didn't do anything wrong. You tell him a believable and convincing lie that he acceps with only slight hesitation. The two of you then decide to spend the rest of your time together comfortably, pretending that the previous incident didn't happen at all, and even if it's just for a short while, it feels really nice.

* * *

You groan when the birds outside start chipring way too loudly, waking you up from what was supposed to be a peaceful slumber. You force yourself to sit up, rubbing away the remaining sleep in your eyes as you swing your legs off of your bed— _Wait_. This isn't Zen's apartment, nor is it Rika's. You're back in your own home. At first, you panic, not knowing just how or when you got there. That's when you finally take notice of your skin—it's _your_ skin colour. Excitedly, you clamber out of bed to inspect yourself in a mirror, and a grin spreads across your lips. You're back in your own body. But why? How?

You move to retrieve your phone, realizing that the RFA app isn't there, and you frown. You could have sworn you had it last night before going to bed after the party. You remember talking with everybody else last night, having them congratulate you on a job well done with the party as well as your official relationship with Zen. Your heart sinks when you remember the actor that you easily fell in love with in just eleven days. Has it really only beem eleven days? Feeling apprehensive, you check the date, and you breathe out a sigh of relief. It's the date after the party; you weren't stuck in some weird time loop or anything crazy like that.

...But now what? You were relieved to find yourself back in your body, but what about the RFA? What about Zen? Biting your lower lip, you decided that you wouldn't get anywhere from just standing there, thinking. You needed to take action. You walk over to your closet and start choosing out an outfit to wear to head outside. You end up spending a bit more time than usual fixing yourself up, wanting to look presentable since you'll be going out to see Zen for the first time in your very own body.

Surprisingly enough, you didn't get lost going to Zen's apartment. Then again, the actor did have his apartment publicly available for his fan mail, and you were able to easily find it with the help of Doodle Maps. You see his apartment come into view, and without thinking about it, you start walking faster towards it. Your heart is racing as your mind starts to wander, thinking of what you could say to Zen when you halt in your steps. You see the actor standing outside, arms tightly wrapped around a woman with brown hair that you were all too familiar with.

 _Of course_. Of course it wouldn't be you. It wasn't _you_ that Zen fell in love with. It was that woman. How could you have been so _stupid_? Your self-deprecating thoughts are cut off shortly as you turn on your heel, deciding that there was no longer any reason for you to stay there much longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the spam but I'm upset and can't sleep and this has actually been in my files for a while now. This will have a happy ending, I swear; I just don't know if I want to make it two-part or multiple chapters.  
> Inspired by the fact that I will never be MC. ~~Do I get jealous over fictional characters? Yes. Very much so; it's annoying and unhealthy.~~


	2. First(?) Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry; I know I initially put gender-neutral reader tag at first, but after writing this chapter, I'm finding it difficult to refer to reader as "they/them" because my mind just automatically goes "one person-singular pronoun" and I'm afraid of slipping up far too often and inconsistency if I tried to keep going as "they/them".

Zen doesn't know what he did wrong— _if_ he did anything wrong.

After the party, you had gone off to bed, tired from the events of the evening as well as the events with the hacker. Even though the two of you had already confessed your love to each other, Zen still felt it would be inappropriate of him to share a bed with you. He wanted to take the relationship slow and steady; he wanted you to be sure that he was the one you wanted. You had laughed at his cute behaviour but didn't argue against his kindness. Nevertheless, now that the two of you were finally in an official relationship, albeit having to do so in secret, Zen was more than excited to start spending his future days with you by his side.

The actor had barely gotten any sleep that night, thoughts far too occupied on you and where this relationship could and would go from here. He couldn't believe it. It's been so long since the actor's been in a relationship. Zen would be lying if he said he wasn't apprehensive about the whole thing. The way the two of you met was so unique and uncommon, it was hard to predict how everything will go, but that didn't mean Zen wasn't going to try to keep your relationship steady.

Zen may have loved other people before, but you were different, as cliché as that might have sounded to him. You were absolutely special to him, and he wasn't going to let go. The actor had woken up early that morning, feeling both restless and refreshed towards your very first day of being an official couple. The young man figured he could try cooking breakfast for you, but before he could do anything, the bedroom door had opened apprehensively and 'you' peeked your head out, making eye contact with him. "Good morning," he greeted 'you' enthusiastically. He moved to give 'you' a morning kiss. "Did you sleep well?"

" _Who are you?_ "

Zen stopped in his tracks at your words before forcing out a laugh, "Babe, please don't joke like that. It'll make me sad."

"I'm serious. Who are you? Where is this? Why am I here?" 'you' started asking all these questions all at once as you finally stepped out of the room, completely dressed and ready to head outside. There was genuine panic and fear in 'your' eyes, so Zen knew that 'you' weren't joking or messing around with him. A frown etched itself onto his lips.

"B-Babe, what are you talking about? It's me, Zen. Don't you remember?" The young man tentatively reached out a hand to touch 'your' shoulder, but 'you' slapped it away.

"Don't touch me!"

Confused and terrified, 'you' started heading towards the door to leave. Zen could only stare at 'your' retreating figure before finally kicking himself to follow after 'you'. He called out 'your' name, just as 'you' had left the apartment but didn't look back, nor did 'you' react to his voice. Just as 'you' were about to walk away after finally heading outside the apartment, Zen had caught up, grasping 'your' wrist and pulling 'you' into a tight embrace, afraid to lose you just when 'you' were finally safe in his arms. 'You' struggled against him, asking—no, _demanding_ —to be let go, but Zen was unrelenting. If anything, struggling just made the young man tighten his grip even more.

"[Name], please...what happened? Why are you like this?" Zen whispered against 'your' ear, but the questions sounded like he was asking himself rather than 'you'.

_"That's not my name."_

* * *

Zen sighed heavily to himself as he took out his phone and logged onto the RFA app. Even your contact information was gone there. Had you deleted the app? The actor frowned as he decided to join in the current open chatroom where Seven was teasing Yoosung again.

> ****Oh, hey Zen!  
>  ****Lololol, well if it isn't the man of the hour.  
>  ****Your press conference last night is all over social media.  
>  ****How's [Name], by the way?  
>  ****She doesn't remember me.  
>  ****What?

Zen's fingers trembled as he fumbled with the keys, typing out what just happened and trying to make sense of everything. Initially, the other two males in the chatroom thought Zen was joking, chiding him for such ill taste in humour. However, when the two went to check if your information on the app really _was_ missing, they didn't know what to think. Yoosung and Seven were just as confused as the actor, and the hacker had logged off, saying he was going to try going through the logs and codes to see if he could find out what happened.

> ****So, you just let her leave?  
>  ****She threatened to contact the authorities on me for kidnapping.  
>  ****Maybe it's amnesia? I don't know _how_ it could have happened, but it's a possibility.  
>  ****I don't think so. When I called after her, she said that it wasn't her name. I don't think she was lying.  
>  ****That's weird...  
>  ****I don't know what to think.  
>  ****My head hurts. I think I'll go for a quick run.  
>  ****Okay. Good luck!  
>  ****Thanks.

With a heavy heart, Zen logged off, throwing his phone haphazardly on the couch as he got up to change into something more suitable for a morning run. As soon as he was ready to go, he retrieved his phone before locking the door shut behind him. Since it was still fairly early in the morning, there weren't that many people outside, much to Zen's relief, allowing him time to try sorting out his thoughts. The air was crisp and felt nice against his exposed skin. The actor took a moment to close his eyes, relishing in the comforting feel—

"Oof!"

Zen opened his eyes when his broad chest ended up colliding with something. _Someone_ , he was corrected when the actor heard a small yelp followed by a dull thud. "Ow..."

You gingerly rubbed your bottom, mentally berating yourself for not being careful. Immediately, your ears perked up when a familiar voice reached your ears. "Oh god, I'm so sorry!" Zen apologized, finally snapping himself back to reality. "Are you alright?" The actor leaned down, offering a hand out to help your fallen figure.

Hesitatingly, you reach out and shyly grab hold of his hand before he helps you up to your feet. "I'm okay. Sorry, I wasn't paying atten—" you stop yourself from talking any further when you feel something wet trail down your cheeks. It's only then do you realize that you're crying, upset at the way Zen had looked at you like you were a stranger. But that's what you actually are to him, aren't you? Even if he was no stranger to you, you were one to him.

"A-Are you hurt? Oh my god, I'm so sorry—"

You cut off Zen's frantic apology with a laugh. Even if he didn't recognize or know you, he was still the same as ever; you couldn't help but feel amused as you tried to bury away your desire to tell him everything. The actor would probably think of you as insane or as a stalker or _something_. When Zen looks at you curiously, you finally stop laughing and go to explain yourself. "You didn't do anything wrong. I just thought you were an angel and that I was dying."

Immediately, Zen's cheeks flush from embarrassment from your words as he laughs, "I'm flattered."

"Anyways, I should get going. It was nice seeing you, Zen—" you clasp your hand onto your mouth far too late, having revealed that you know his name. Despite your initial idea to act as though the two of you have never met, you've already slipped up.

The young man cocks his head to the side and asks, "Have we met before...?" Zen doesn't know why he asked that question, but he felt as though the answer to that was yes. There was something _off_ about you, but it wasn't unpleasant. Just...familiar.

You force yourself to offer a rehearsed smile, hoping it was enough to convince the actor. "No...I'm just a fan."

Zen's eyes light up at your response. "Really? Oh wow. Uh, do you mind if I take a selfie with you? It's not every day I bump into a fan like this. Especially not someone as cute as you."

"O-Oh, um, okay..." you answer lamely, your mind lagging a slight bit as you tried to process his words.

Zen beamed as he fished through his pockets for his phone before briskly making his way over to stand at your side. He leaned in close to you so that both of your faces could fit in the frame, and you involuntarily tense up as you breathe in his scent and feel his warmth. Your fingers twitch slightly. You want to kiss him. You want to kiss him like how he did before on that night he confessed his feelings for you. Slowly, you let out a shaky breath, hoping those desires could leave with it before you brought your eyes to face the phone and smiled.

"Thanks," Zen says to you as he puts his phone away. You feel as though you should be the one thanking him, but you hold your tongue. "I'm glad that something good happened this morning. I thought it was going to be a bad day after what happened, but you definitely made it much better."

Curious, you tilt your head to the side. Something happened? "What do you mean?" you try to ask for clarification before letting out a small gasp. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry!" The actor chuckles at you, but before he can respond, you're fishing out your phone from your pocket having felt it vibrate with a new text message. "I'm sorry, I have to go. Bye!"

"Bye..." Zen trails off, realizing that he actually doesn't know your name, but before he could ask, you've already turned on your heel and left.


	3. Working Together

It's been a few days now since the RFA party was held. A few days since 'you' practically fled from Zen's apartment. The actor had taken some time off from his job beforehand to help prepare for the RFA party, but now that everything's done and over with, he was more than ready to go back to work. Zen slipped on his signature white jacket as he retrieved his phone, giving it a quick glance through to see if he missed any texts or calls before he placed the device securely in his pocket. He left his apartment, making sure to lock the door behind him before making his way over to his destination.

The theatre that Zen would be working with this time was relatively close to his apartment, much to the young man's relief. That would mean less travel time and more time for practice. He hoped that everything would go well. After all, the whole fiasco with Echo Girl was still fresh in the media, and there was no doubt that people would be watching him closely and judgingly. The actor felt extremely thankful towards his director for having complete and utter faith in him throughout the whole situation. Zen considered treating his director out for a drink some time later as a small token of appreciation.

"Zen! Good to see you!"

Zen looks up, breaking out of his thoughts and greets his enthusiastic director as he leads him inside the meeting room where the others were idly waiting. Since it was just the first day, the schedule that was laid out only consisted of introductions and a quick explanation of the piece they would be performing this time. If they had some extra time, they might read through a few scenes, but the actual rehearsals and everything else wouldn't be until much later.

The actor sits down on an available seat as he waits for everybody else to arrive. He picks up the script copy in front of his seat and flips through the pages, his eyes skimming through the overall play. A few moments later, and all the people who are supposed to be there finally arrive, and Zen is eager to start. They all go around in a circle, introducing themselves and the character they would be playing, offering a few small comments on how excited they are to be a part of this particular play. It all seems to be the same for everyone, but their words are genuine and sincere.

When it's Zen's turn to introduce himself, there are a few scrutinizing stares, no doubt a reaction from the media about being accused of sexual harrassment, but Zen doesn't let it deter him. The actor keeps his introduction friendly and shows he's determined to make the show a success along with everybody else. That seems to wash away the other actors' worries as when he goes to sit down again, they all offer nods of acknowledgement and approval. Zen feels a bit proud of himself as he nods back.

Once the initial introductions are done and over with, Zen is quietly analyzing the script to himself when he hears the door open, but he's too engrossed to look up to acknowledge the latecomer. That was until he heard a familiar name.

"[Name]! I'm so glad you could make it!"

Instinctively, Zen looks up, hoping to see the brown locks with golden eyes that he's assosciated with the name, but instead, his eyes fall over your form. You're not quite the person Zen was expecting to see, but he isn't disappointed either to see your familiar face from a few days ago. From the corner of your eye, you watch Zen's reaction, and you feel your heart slowly shatter for getting his hopes up. Finally, you turn your gaze towards the director of this play and apologize.

"I'm so sorry I'm late." You offer no excuses and merely promise that it won't happen again. The director smiles at you, clapping his hand on your shoulder as he addresses the other people in the room.

"This is [Name]. She's a translator who will be offering her assistance every now and then," the director introduces you.

You give a curt bow, "It's a pleasure. Please take care of me." It was a short and simple introduction, but you were feeling far too nervous, especially when you knew that Zen was staring at you.

"Translator?" somebody in the room asks before anybody else could.

The director nods and moves to explain, "This piece is a complete original that was written in English. I saw it when I travelled over to North America, and I fell in love with it. I've contacted the theatre who originally performed this piece, asking if it would be okay for us to translate it and perform it ourselves here, and they've given us the okay."

"I was the one who translated the script and songs," you added to the explanation. "However, sometimes the translation could come off as awkward when performing, especially with the songs, so I'll be here to help make changes to the script and lyrics as you go through it to make sure that everything flows naturally."

It's a bit strange, but nobody argues and merely accepts it. After all, _anything_ could happen in a musical theatre. Everybody in the room goes over the script, voicing their opinions on the dialogue and asking occasional questions about their character. You attentively take notes of everybody's concerns of the script, hoping to polish it up so that everybody is comfortable with it but still conveys the same emotions as the original. You've seen the original play itself, and you wanted the show to be successful just as much as the others did. Your pencil scrawls across the sheets of paper when you sense someone's eyes on you. Curious, you glance up and make eye contact with Zen. He gives a small jump in his seat and quickly averts his eyes, embarrassed that he was caught staring.

The day drags on, and the clock ticks on by until the director thinks now would be a good place to stop for the day. Everybody starts saying their farewells and slowly trickle out of the room, one by one. You linger behind to leave last, just in case anybody wanted to personally talk to you about any private concerns they would have in regards to the script. As soon as a good portion of the cast leave, you start to pack up your things so that you could head home as well. You hear footsteps approach you, and you pause in your actions. Your eyes see a familiar flash of white, and you know right away who it is without even looking.

"So, we meet again," Zen smiles, striking up a conversation with you, much to your surprise.

You laugh lightly, "It's a small world."

There's a small lull in the conversation before Zen speaks up again, "You know, your name..." The actor trails off, and you look at him curiously. For a second, you think he's going to say that it's the same as somebody he knows, and a sad smile makes its way onto your lips. Zen notices the emotion behind it, but he decides not to comment on it, uncertain. Instead, he continues, "it's a very beautiful name."

It wasn't what you were expecting, so you're left standing there feeling slightly confused. Eventually, you're able to find your voice again, "Th-Thank you..."

Once again, an awkward silence fills the air between you two, and you go back to packing your things. You feel yourself grow more tense as Zen lingers around you, and it takes all your effort not to look at him. You don't know what it is that he wants, but you don't know how to phrase it without sounding rude or annoyed. Eventually, you finish gathering your belongings and offer your farewells to the last few people in the room as you leave. Zen follows after you, much to your surprise.

"Do you...um, need anything?" you finally find it in yourself to speak.

"Do you know about the RFA?"

"Wh-What?" you end up stuttering, surprised by the actor's unexpected question. You quickly try to regain yourself, "I-If you mean I've heard of it, then yes. Isn't that the charity group who holds parties and stuff? That's where you had your press conference, right? Why are you asking?"

You finally manage to stop yourself from looking any more suspicious and strange with your rambling. The actor shrugs, "Just curious. In any case, let's both do our best for this play!"

You nod, "Yeah. Please don't overexert yourself this time."

"Ah, you're talking about my ankle, right?"

_Wait_. Was that information publicly available or was it something Zen only mentioned in the RFA app? You can't remember; your memory was never really that great when it counted. "Oh _god_ , I sound like a stalker, don't I? I'm so sorry. If I'm making you uncomfortable, I swear I'll keep my distance."

"Please don't." Zen's answer was immediate.

"What?"

The young man continues, "Please don't keep your distance from me. I enjoy your company. I know it sounds strange, especially since we just met, but...it's nice. I feel at ease with you, so I hope that we can be good friends."

You feel your heart clench at the word "friend" but you try not to let it show on your face. "Sure. That sounds nice."


	4. Home

You let out a frustrated groan, your hand reaching up to scratch at your head. Your eyes are glued to the script in front of you, all sorts of markings and notes scribbled across, plus the occasional doodles in the margins. You knew that translating something as big as this wasn't going to be this easy, but this was starting to stress you out way too much. Deciding that you could use a much needed break, you retrieve your phone, opening it with the hopes that somebody was online in the chatroom. 

Your finger freezes just above the screen. ...Right. You had completely forgotten that the RFA app was no longer on your phone. You tried searching for it again on the app store, but no such luck. Desperate, you even searched online for maybe an apk or _something_. Of course, you came up empty handed. The messenger was exclusive to the RFA after all.

A sigh escapes you as you consider your other options. There really wasn't much to do at your place, plus it was getting rather stifling inside, even after opening all the windows. You figured it wouldn't hurt to go for a walk. After changing into something more presentable for outside wear than your comfort home clothes, you start wandering around the streets.

It's been a while since you've actually spent some time for yourself outside. You weren't fond of all the noise and bustling people, but it felt nice for a change in scenery. It definitely helped with your mood that the weather was just ideal.

Then, somehow, without even realizing it, you found yourself wandering around Zen's apartment. Your heart feels heavy as you longingly stare at the apartment. Even if it wasn't for that long, you held so many precious memories there, but you couldn't. It wasn't _you_ that Zen shared those memories with, but you try not to let it bother you. After all, you were given the chance to work with him again, and for now, that was more than enough.

"Oh yeah, now that I think about it, there should be..." you mumbled to yourself as you walked around the area in search for something. "Ah, there!"

Your eyes lit up instantly when you saw the person selling goldfish-shaped bread. Unable to contain your excitement, you lightly jog over. The vendor greets you with a large friendly smile which you return. In all honesty, even if you didn't get to know this man personally, you felt grateful for what he did in helping Zen out with his scandal at the party. You order yourself a bag of goldfish-shaped bread, thanking the man (for more than just the food), and then turning on your heel. However, before you could even start walking, you hear your name being called out.

"O-Oh, Zen!" you sound surprised, and you're confused as to why when you really should have expected bumping into him. He _did_ live in the area, after all.

The actor smiles at you in greeting before making small conversation with the vendor and buying his own bag of goldfish-shaped bread. He then turns his attention back to you and gestures for you to walk with him which you're more than happy to oblige. "I never expected to run into you here. What's up?"

"I needed a break from translating the script," you answer as you hold up your bag of the snack, your lips curving upwards into a smile as you look up at him. "A good...um, friend...of mine told me that they sold some really good goldfish-shaped bread here, so I wanted to try them out."

Zen offers a small hum of acknowledgement, "Your friend has really good taste."

Your smile falters for a second, and you bring your gaze down to the ground, but Zen doesn't seem to notice the change in your demeanour. Your lips part to whisper quietly, "He does..."

At that comment, Zen raises a curious eyebrow, "Oh? A boy, huh...? Your boyfriend?"

There's a teasing lilt to the young man's voice, and you roll his eyes, unreservedly smacking his arm. Not too hard though as you're uncertain as to how much physical action would be allowed at your current stage of...whatever weird relationship this was. "Just because he's a boy and a friend doesn't automatically make him my boyfriend," you reply, sounding exasperated.

_Even though I want him to be._

You bite your tongue, opting to keep that last comment to yourself. Things were complicated enough as they were right now. You really didn't need any more other comments to further throw you into confusion and frustration. The conversation dies down after that, and both you and Zen just walk in silence. You try to steal a glance at him and accidentally make eye-contact. Embarrassed of having been caught looking at each other, the both of you quickly and awkwardly direct your gaze elsewhere.

The young man clears his throat, hoping to push away the tense atmosphere between the two of you. "Since you're here, do you want to go over the script together?" he suggests.

You can't help but laugh as you comment, "You really are a workaholic..."

A slight blush forms on Zen's cheeks as he stutters, "A-Ah, sorry; I wasn't being considerate. I'm sure a charming person such as yourself already has other plans..."

You wave your hand in a friendly dismissive gesture, trying not to focus too much on how he had called you charming. "Oh, no, I'm available, actually. It'd be nice to get some work done with you."

"Great! We can do it at my place since it's just around here," Zen beams as he leads you to his apartment. It's unnecessary since you already know where it is, but you allow yourself to fall a step behind him.

* * *

"Feel free to make yourself at home," he says as he goes to retrieve his script from his room.

You slip off your shoes at the entryway and walk over to the table, pulling out a chair to sit on. You blink back the tears that threaten to fall now that you're inside his apartment, surrounded by his familiar scent as you remember the past two weeks of a whirlwind of events with the RFA. Your ears pick up on Zen coming out of his room, and you take a deep breath, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand.

Since this small session was rather spur of the moment, you didn't bring your script, so you had to share with Zen's. The two of you placed your respective chairs closely beside each other as the two of you poured over the sheets of paper, but it was extremely hard to focus when you could feel Zen's warmth radiating from his body and hear his every single breath.

You go to move a sheet of paper, and in doing so, one of the pencils rolled off the table and landed on the floor with a small clattering sound. Instinctively, both you and the actor bend down to reach it, and a soft thud resounds in the room.

""Ow!"" you both react simultaneously, pulling back and rubbing your foreheads.

The situation was so ridiculous that the two of burst out into laughter. Zen is the first to come out of his laughing fit, and he gently places a hand on your forehead, massaging it softly. "Sorry. Are you okay?"

You press your lips together in a firm line to stop yourself from screaming at how close Zen was and give a mechanical nod. This wasn't the first time Zen had been close with you; hell, the two of you even shared a kiss one time, but that was different! At those times, you were inside another woman's body, so there was a certain sense of detachment from the young man's touch, but now... Now you were back in your own body that you were familiar with, and everything with Zen was like a whole new experience.

A chime comes from Zen's phone, but it's a sound that you're all too familiar with and love, and your fingers subconsciously twitch to go retrieve your phone. You're able to stop yourself, however, and abruptly stand up from your seat.

"I-I, um... have to use the washroom," you explain.

"Sure, it's—" Zen starts to tell you where it was located, but you're already making your own way there.

You shut the door behind you and lean back against it. You can't keep doing this, you realized. Pretending to be a stranger when you were once something so much more with Zen is tearing you apart. You want to hold him, and kiss him, and tell him how much you love him, but _you can't_. There's no way Zen would be able to make sense of the situation—even you _yourself_ were still confused as to what was going on—and you didn't want to scare him away.

_You can't do this._


	5. Dawning

Over the next couple of days, you try to avoid Zen unless necessary while you work with the rest of the theatre company. You don't want to avoid him, but your heart can't take how distant Zen seems to act with you. It wasn't anything bad; the young man was still friendly with you, but it lacked the special warmth you were looking for. You were selfish and greedy, you hated to admit, but Zen meant so much to you. He made you feel special and loved, and now you were back to the beginning. But you didn't want to be at the beginning again; you wanted a continuation.

"Did I...do something wrong?"

Your eyes snap upwards from your seat at the question as the actor gazes down at you with a hurt expression. You feel guilty for being the reason why he's like that, and you shake your head. "No, it's just... You remind me of a guy I used to like." You flinch slightly at having to lie like this, but you can't think of anything else to do.

Zen sits down beside you, "...Was it a bad break up or something? I mean, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but..."

"It's complicated," you breathe out. You allow yourself to lean against his shoulder and gauge his reaction. He doesn't move away nor tense up. Instead, Zen adjusts himself so that you would be more comfortable.

"I loved him," you confessed quietly, and you feel Zen shift slightly. You take a moment to take a deep breath as you continue, choking out a sob. "And I still do—"

You turn to your side to bury yourself into Zen, and he's more than willing to offer his comfort to you. His arms go to wrap around your trembling shoulders as you continue to cry, all your emotions spilling out. "He's gentle, and sweet, and hardworking; a bit of a narcissist but overall a really good guy, but he—he doesn't remember me. Doesn't _know_ me, and it hurts!"

You gasp for air, and the young man strokes your head softly to reassure you. He doesn't know what's spurred this on, but it pains him to see somebody as hardworking and kind as you crying like this. Zen doesn't know who this person is that you're talking about nor the circumstances of your situation, but the actor can't help but feel irritated. You didn't deserve this.

After a few more minutes of crying, you've finally managed to calm down. You pull away from Zen reluctantly and excuse yourself to use the washroom so that you could fix yourself up before break was over. As you walk away with your back towards him, you don't see the hurt in Zen's eyes while he watches your retreating figure.

* * *

Zen feels confused and conflicted. It's been a while since he's last seen 'you' and wonders where 'you've' gone and how 'you're' doing. While his mind wanders to his memories of the young woman he'd fallen in love with, he can't help but find his thoughts going back to you too. There was just _something_ about you. Was it fate? But didn't Zen already decide that he was fated to be with 'you'?

The actor growls to himself as he buries his face in his pillows. Sighing, he takes out his cell phone and texts Seven, asking if he's gotten any new information about 'you'.

_"Yeah, about that... She definitely exists, but the weird part is this—"_

Zen reads the text over and over, anxiety filling his chest as he waits for the continuation.

_"Remember how I did a back-up check on [Name] when she first joined? So, her social media says that isn't her name at all. I mean, her real name is Mi-Suk; I thought she was just going by [Name] similar to how you prefer to go by ZEN instead of Hyun, so I didn't think much of it."_

_"Anyways!"_

_"I tried hacking into Mi-Suk's phone records, and this is where it gets creepy—"_

Zen rolled his eyes at Seven's spaced out texts. Why couldn't he just send everything at once? _"What is it?"_

_"Mi-Suk's phone never installed the app. It was installed onto a differet phone and the app just appeared on Mi-Suk's instead for some reason."_

_"Wait, I'm confused,"_ Zen's eyebrows stitched together when he couldn't make sense of all this information.

_"Basically, somebody else installed the app, but it was Mi-Suk who got it and interacted with us. Since you never know how the world works in mysterious ways, I decided to see if I can find out if [Name] could be a different person from Mi-Suk. It's hard to tell since people can share names, buuuut, I think [Name] and Mi-Suk are two completely different people."_

Zen suddenly became very dizzy. Two different people? So then what? Zen was showering all his affection towards the wrong person? If Mi-Suk was the woman with brown hair and golden brown eyes, then who was [Name]? Who was the real [Name] that Zen loved? The actor's thoughts immediately went to you. It couldn't be... After all, you acted like it was your first time meeting Zen.

...Maybe it really was an act.

_"If I work hard enough, I should be able to track down the phone that originally installed the app if I cross-reference it with the name that isn't Mi-Suk's, but it will take a while."_

_"Find it,"_ Zen ordered, his fingers deftly typing at the keys. _"Find out who [Name] really is, Seven. I need to know. Please."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really didn't want to drag out the drama between Zen being completely oblivious of MC and reader being two completely different people, but at the same time, I'm not ready to have him realize everything yet. From here on, please look forward to awkward and clumsy Zen/reader fluff!


	6. Stargazing

It's late in the night, but Zen just can't find the motivation or inspiration to do anything. There were so many questions and thoughts circling around in his head; they were far too distracting that they prevented the young man from doing anything asides from lying sprawled across his couch. Heaving a sigh, the actor forced himself to sit up, a small grunt leaving his lips as he decided to go out for a late night jog. Exercise always did help clear his mind after all.

Making sure to grab a sweater since it did tend to get chilly in the late hours, Zen left his apartment and went on his way. The young man had no plan as to how long or how far he would jog, but he decided to take a different route from his usual runs. It was when he was passing by a park that he noticed you. You were sitting on a bench, all alone, with your head tilted back to gaze at the sky.

Before he realized it, Zen's feet had already decided to take a detour from his run and instead made their way over to you and your unsuspecting form. "It's dangerous for a pretty lady such as yourself to be by yourself this late at night," Zen decides to make his presence known and offers you a small warning.

At his voice, you direct your gaze towards him, and he offers a small wave and smile in greeting. You reciprocate it before asking, "What brings you here?"

"I needed a distraction," Zen answers vaguely, and though you _are_ curious, you decide not to ask him to elaborate further. "May I join you?" he asks and gestures towards the space beside you.

You give a short nod, moving aside just a bit more before rubbing your arms for some warmth. When you first arrived to sit at this bench, the temperature was perfectly fine, but now it had gotten colder, and you regretted not bringing something warmer to wear. This didn't escape Zen's notice, and he immediately took off his sweater and offered it to you before he could sit down on the bench with you.

"We wouldn't want you to get sick now, would we?" He's still as chivalrous as ever, you noted.

You hesitated on taking the warm and inviting outerwear, "Oh, um...are you sure? Wouldn't you get cold...?"

Zen chuckles and shakes his head, "It's fine. I was just running, so I'm pretty warm, actually."

You offer a small hum and whisper a word of thanks before accepting the sweater. Your fingers accidentally brush against Zen's, and you find yourself becoming embarrassed, so you quickly put the sweater on and try to bury your face in it. Zen finally decides to sit beside you, and when a comfortable silence settles in the space between you two, you allow your head to dip back so that you could continue gazing at the stars.

From beside you, you can feel Zen's eyes staring at your form, and you force yourself to not look. Eventually, however, the actor follows your gaze and brings his attetion to the twinkling lights in the sky. It's a clear night, and the stars look absolutely gorgeous. As he stares at them, Zen can't help but remember the first time he watched the stars with 'you' when 'you' visited his place for the first time.

That was the first time Zen ever found himself revealing much of his character to someone else. What was it again? He was sure he commented on how strange 'you' were, almost as if he's known 'you' for a very long time now. And now again, being beside you, he can't help but feel comfortable in your presence. Curious, Zen decides to steal a glance your way, and his heart skips a beat.

The way your eyes shine as you look at the stars above you looks so brilliant. Your cheeks are flushed, and Zen can't tell if it's from the cold or embarrassment. Then, there were your lips. They were curved into a smile, but there was a certain sense of lonely nostalgia in it. Almost as though you were remembering a happy memory but feeling saddened at the fact that it was nothing more than a memory now.

Feeling his eyes on you, you finally take your attention off of the sky and towards him. Zen jumps from surprise, feeling warmth crawl up to his cheeks and tips of his ears of having been caught staring. "You're beautiful!" he blurts out in a panic, and his face flushes even more after realizing his mistake.

Your eyes widen slowly at his words, "What?"

"I-I mean, _they're_ beautiful," Zen tries to correct himself, turning his head back to the sky, hoping it would help hide his blushing face. "The stars, I mean."

"Oh..." the actor hears you reply, and he could have sworn that you sounded disappointed. Before he could comment on it though, you continued, "Yes, they are, aren't they?" The conversation lulls into an awkward silence after that, and unable to bear it any longer, you say the first thing that's on your mind. "Can I...hold your hand?"

Zen turns to look back at you, and this entire situation— _scene_ —is just way too similar as that other night. The main female lead and stage may be different, but the atmosphere is still there. The lines were the same. Not wanting to diverge from the script of that one special moment, Zen can't stop himself from repeating the same words you offered when he asked if it would be alright to hold your hand, "Hold it tight, and never let go."


	7. Injury

Zen's acting strange, you realized. He seems almost jittery and careful around you, and it doesn't escape your notice. You've noticed the way his gaze would linger on you whenever you would walk into his line of vision. The way his lips just naturally curve into a smile whenever you make eye contact with him. The way he would strike up a conversation with you about anything and everything, asking stuff about the things you liked or disliked; your hobbies; your dreams and goals for the future.

In all honesty, if you didn't know that he had feelings for the woman whose body you were stuck in for eleven days, you would have thought that the actor had feelings for you instead. The thought entertains you for a brief second before you quickly bury it away. It would be best not to get your hopes up just when you were finally starting to get comfortable around Zen.

"I have a question," Zen randomly starts one day during his break that he decided to spend with you again.

"What is it?" you ask as you idly twirl a pencil between your fingers.

"Do any of these names sound familiar to you?" he asks and pauses as he waits for you to answer. You nod your head, gesturing for him to continue. "Luciel—"

Of course Zen decided to start with the strangest sounding name, and the pencil you were twirling flies out of your hand from abrupt surprise. You're too flustered to see Zen's reaction, and you scramble to pick up the pencil. You offer a nervous laugh and apologize, refusing to make eye contact with him as you bite the inside of your cheek. For a moment, Zen remains quiet, and you will yourself not to look his way before he eventually starts listing all of the other RFA members' names.

V.

Yoosung Kim.

Jaehee Kang.

Jumin Han.

The young man had asked if any of those names sounded familiar to you, and you bit your tongue that threatened to spill the truth. Of course you were familiar with them. Those were the names of the new friends you've made. The people who found their way into your heart with such ease. The people you will never be able to talk to again because you're not a part of the RFA anymore. Technically, you never were; it was that woman—not you.

"Umm..." you try to act thoughtful, pausing to make it seem like you were trying to remember. "Jumin Han is part of C&R, I-I think...? I might have heard his name on the news, but I-I'm not too sure about the other names, I'm sorry."

Your eyes glance underneath your lashes over to look at Zen, wondering if your acting skills were any good as his. You're unable to read his expression, and you hear him mutter, "Of course it's that Trust Fund Kid jerk" before flashing you a smile. "Ah, okay. You don't need to apologize; I was just curious."

To your relief, the others are calling for Zen, signalling the end of his break and unknowingly saving you from having to continue with this dangerous line of conversation. Both you and Zen stand up and go back to doing your own things. While Zen goes to the respective group he'll be practicing for a specific scene, you wander around to the other groups, offering help whenever needed.

The script and songs have pretty much been finalized by now, so there was no longer any need for your presence there, but the director was more than happy to have you stay and watch over their rehearsals, especially since it was requested by Zen himself. Of course, you felt bad just watching, so you would offer whatever small help you could, whether it was handling props or going on coffee runs.

Unbeknownst to you, Zen was staring at your figure as you walked around. It was suspicious, the way you acted whenever he would bring up something about the RFA, but he wanted to know if it really _was_ you—the true identity of his precious someone behind the screen. The topic seemed to make you uncomfortable, so Zen tried to avoid talking about the RFA too much, but he had no other way to verify who you were.

You shared the same name, but were you even the same person? He felt the need to know, not just for his sake, but for you as well. After all, both you and Zen have already confessed your love to each other. While it may not have been public knowledge, the two of you knew that your hearts both beat for each other. If it wasn't Mi-Suk, then where was the true you that offered your heart to Zen? Were you lost and confused as he was, not knowing where your other half was?

But even though Zen thought this, he felt a magnetic pull towards you. It definitely felt familiar, but Zen couldn't trust himself. After all, he had just lost the person he loved, and unable to find his special someone, he felt that maybe he was just trying to force those feelings onto you and tried to rationalize what he felt for both the you right now, and the 'you' he chatted with on the messenger.

Zen was just about to turn his attention away from you and focus on his work again when he noticed something off. The shelf that was messily filled to the brim with all sort of props and abandoned costumes was tipping over precariously. It seems like you noticed it too, and both you and Zen didn't bother wasting a single second, immediately springing to action.

You pushed the unsuspecting actor out of the way, making sure that they were alright; however, that gave you no time to react to get yourself out of harm's way. Then suddenly, you feel yourself come into contact from the side with something hard, pushing you away and landing on the floor. The loud crashing sound of the shelf falling to the floor filled the room which was immediately followed by several gasps and surprised shrieks.

Your eyes were closed the entire time, having prepared to brace yourself for the impact, but to your confused surprise, you were fine. "Are you hurt?" a whispered voice breathes heavily into your ear, sending shivers down your spine. You finally become aware of somebody's form on top of you, encased in their warmth. One hand was behind your head, no doubt to cushion it so that you wouldn't hit it against the floor when you fell while the other arm was wrapped around your waist, pulling you flush against their own body.

It's only when you feel the long silvery strands tickle your face do you realize that Zen just saved you. "...Zen the Knight," you find yourself giggling slightly, adrenaline still pumping through your veins. You hear a familiar breathy chuckle followed by a small sigh of relief. Your heart is beating erratically, and you can hear Zen's is too, on top of you, but you can't tell if it was because of adrenaline or something else entirely.

With a small grunt, the actor finally pushes himself off of you, and the two of you sit up while everybody else rushes over to make sure that you're both alright. "I'm fine," you reassure them and then turn your gaze to Zen. He looks slightly frazzled, but overall okay—that is, until he winces when he tries to move his feet.

"Ahhh," he sighs, "I think I broke my ankle. Again."

Despite how nonchalant he seems, panic and guilt immediately rises in your chest, and you move forward to inspect it. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry—"

Zen cuts off your frantic apology with a laugh and pats your head, "Babe, it's okay. I'm fine. It's not your fault anyways."

Your eyes widen by a fraction and become stunned silent at what he just called you. Ever since you returned to your own body and encountered Zen again, he had not once _ever_ called you "babe". Sure, he may have left a few flirtatious comments here and there, but he never called you "babe", perhaps because he was reserving it for his special somebody instead. You don't think Zen even realized, and you decide against commenting on it.

"We should probably get you to the hospital to get that checked out," the director suggests, bringing your attention back to the present.

"I'll accompany you," you instantly offer to Zen, and the corners of his lips curve upwards into an appreciative smile.

"Sure, I'd like that."

* * *

After what seemed to take forever, Zen was finally able to leave, but not without a cast over his ankle yet again. While the two of you were heading back home with you offering your weight to support him, you couldn't help but start to feel guilty. If he hadn't come saved you, then the young man wouldn't have gotten hurt.

You sniffled, wiping away the stray tears with the back of your hand. Zen immediately stopped walking, and concerned, pulled you over to the side. He watched with a pained expression as you continued to cry, your shoulders trembling as you kept your gaze downcast, ashamed. After steadying himself, Zen reached out to cup your tear-stained cheek, gently guiding your face to look up at him.

"Babe, what's wrong?" Again, he called you by that nickname without a moment of hesitation. His voice is gentle and caring as he wipes the tears away with the pad of his thumb.

"I'm sorry," is all you could say before the actor presses his hand against your cheek much more firmly.

The young man shakes his head, "It's not your fault."

" _But_ —"

"It'll heal in no time," Zen interrupted you, wanting nothing more than to reassure you and to make you stop crying. He hates it; seeing you look so heartbroken. Women's tears were always something he was weak to, but with you, it was just so... "Thank you for worrying about me," he smiles softly, "but I much prefer see you smiling with me rather than crying for me."

At his words, you nod in understanding, mustering up a small smile. You're just about to go wipe your remaining tears away, but Zen beats you to it, placing his lips on your cheeks and gently kissing the tears away. You tense up underneath him. "Z-Zen...?"

The actor finally realizes what he did, eyes widening and hastily backs away from you. The momentum causes him to stumble, but you're quick to catch him and help him regain his footing.

"S-Sorry," he apologized, not knowing what he was apologizing for.

"I-It's okay..."


	8. Confession

Despite what Zen said, he's still frustrated on how he has to miss out on practice _again_ , but at the very least, the company isn't under pressure of a tight schedule this time, so rehearsals could be pushed back a bit. Zen felt guilty for hindering the progress (even though they were actually _ahead_ of schedule), but everyone was more than understanding, especially after they've seen just how much effort he's been putting into the show.

"Zen," you call out to the actor from his kitchen. You still felt a small pang of guilt for what happened, plus you didn't want to leave Zen alone for various reasons (some being personal), so you had decided to spend as much time as you can around him and help with whatever little things you could do around his house so that the young man could focus on a speedy recovery. Zen didn't seem to mind; in fact, he admittedly felt kind of happy that he got to spend more time with you.

"Yeah babe?" he called out from his living room, perched on his couch as he looked over his script. He really hadn't realized the change in his manner of speech around you at all; it just seemed so natural and... _right_ that Zen didn't even so much as give it a second thought. You never did bring it up though in conversation, secretly enjoying it.

"You're running low on food, so I'm gonna go for a quick grocery run. Is there anything you'd like?"

When you don't hear the male respond right away, you poke your head out of the kitchen and into the living room, thinking that perhaps he didn't hear you. However, the actor seems to be deep in thought as he hums before turning his head towards you. "I'm not too sure. How about I just come with you?"

You raise an eyebrow skeptically, and Zen pulls the most innocent face he can muster with ease. He knows _exactly_ what he wants, and that is to go shopping with you, but he wasn't going to just say it outright. He figured if he acted indecisive, he could use that as an excuse to tag along with you. Unfortunately, he wouldn't be able to hold your hand because of his crutches, but as long as he can stay by your side, then he can live with it.

"You're injured," you state matter-of-factly.

"I'm feeling better now, really!" Zen insists, "it's just this cast that doesn't allow me to walk properly, but it doesn't hurt or anything."

"Ah, but you just admitted that you can't walk properly," you retorted, giving a small smirk.

"I have you," he shot back, completely unashamed at how those vague words could have been interpreted.

You narrow your eyes at him as you try to think of a comeback but end up failing. You don't miss the way Zen's eyes triumphantly light up when you heave a defeated sigh, and you shake your head, exasperated. "Fine. Let me just fix myself up in the washroom, then we'll go."

"Mkay!" the young man hums cheerfully to himself. It's kind of strange, his thinks. The last time he got injured, he was so upset and could barely find the energy to do anything, but now... Now he had you by his side. It felt nice being in the company of the person he loved—

 _Love_?

Is that what he felt for you? He couldn't deny that he felt an attraction towards you, his thoughts consisting of almost always you since the two of you started working together, but he wasn't sure if the feeling was mutual. The actor decides to push those thoughts away and just enjoy things as they are now. He's already been through a lot; surely it should be okay for him to be a bit selfish just this once?

* * *

"Zen, _stop_!" you practically hiss at the young man as you swat his hand away that tried to reach for the plastic bags you were holding.

"But _babe_ —" he whined, and you placed all of the bags you were holding into one hand so that your free one could go and press an index finger to his lips, effectively shutting him up.

Zen wasn't the only one whose demeanor changed, you realized. Ever since he started calling you "babe", you found yourself falling back into that comfortable persona you once were when around him, no longer holding back as much with your words or touches. Before you could attempt to convince the male on how he should leave everything to you and just focus on recovering instead, Zen puckered his lips which were still underneath your finger and made a small smacking sound.

You immediately pull your hand away from his face. "Did you just kiss my finger?!" your voice rises in pitch as you feel yourself blush several shades deeper. Zen doesn't say a word and merely offers a playful smirk and wink. "Y-You're unbelievable, I swear."

The two of you eventually resume walking with you still stubbornly refusing to let Zen carry any of the bags when you see a familiar face, causing you to stop in your tracks. Zen seems to notice and curiously follows your gaze. When he sees who you're looking at, his lips part and suddenly he doesn't know what to do. Almost as though sensing your gaze, the young woman you were staring at looked up from her phone and locked eyes with you. You watch as realization dawns on your face, and she takes a tentative step towards you which is enough to pull you out of your whirling thoughts.

You turn towards Zen, "I'm sorry. Could you wait here? There's something I need to talk about with that person."

The actor raises an eyebrow at you, "You know her?" His voice sounds more surprised than questioning.

You bite your lower lip, "Kind of...?" It's not exactly a lie, but it wasn't like you had any intention of spilling the whole truth anyways. Zen just stares at you for a moment before nodding, gesturing for you to go. You offer him a word of thanks as you leave him with the groceries and walk towards the woman whose body you were stuck in for two weeks.

"Um, hello," you greet her awkwardly, uncertain on how to go about this.

"I know who you are," the young woman says bluntly which catches you by surprise.

"Y-You do?"

She nods, crossing her arms over her chest, "Yeah, since I had to live in your body for about two weeks."

"Ah, so that's what happened to my body while I..." you trail off and flash the brunette an apologetic frown, "I-I'm so sorry for what I did to your body while I was..."

You can't seem to finish any of your sentences, and you mentally berate yourself. "It's fine," the young woman sighs as she looks at you with an almost guilty expression. "...It's the same for me."

The both of you instinctively pick at the sleeves of your arms as an awkward silence fills the air. At some point, you're not sure who, but one of you had tried asking the other if they had an explanation as to what happened, but neither of you had a clue. Unable to come up with a response, but also seemingly satisfied with how nothing else strange happened to either one of you since then, you both decided to just continue living your lives as you normally would.

"I-I, um..." you try to speak when you feel like the conversation is about to come to an end. You felt like you needed to say what you had in mind. "Thank you for not contacting the authorities on Zen. I'm sure it must have been confusing and frightening, waking up in a complete stranger's house."

"Zen...? Oh, do you mean that guy you were with?" the young woman asks, and you nod. She sighs in response, "Well, I admit I was surprised, but since I was living in somebody else's body just prior, I just kind of assumed that my body was being used by another person that led to circumstances in 'me' having to sleep in a different house. You, um... You didn't have sex with him while using my body, right?

"No!" you exclaim, feeling both embarrassed and offended at the question. "Of course not!"

The brunette raises her hands in surrender, "I just wanted to make sure! Like, if you did, if you guys used a condom."

"We never—I never—" you were getting extremely flustered with this line of conversation, constantly opening your mouth but being unable to find the words.

"Okay, okay. I believe you. It's just that the way that Zen guy looked at me thinking that I was you was so warm and loving, I just assumed... ...Anyways, I have to go."

You nod in agreement. "Same. Um...it was nice meeting you..." you trail off and find yourself blushing even more when you realized you didn't even know this woman's name.

"Mi-Suk," she introduces herself to you when she notices your hesitation. "It was nice meeting you too."

After a somewhat awkward and clumsy farewell, you turn on your heel to go back to Zen's side. You find him sitting down on a bench, his crutches at the side, and you grimace at your lack of consideration. You had left a guy with a cast to just _stand there_ , and with plastic bags at that.

"I'm so sorry," you apologize profusely to Zen who seemed to be lost in thought before you returned.

"There's nothing for you to apologize for," he easily dismisses it with a smile and continues to move the conversation forward. "Have you finished talking with that person?"

'Yes," you answer the young man, helping him up to his feet so that the two of you could go back to his apartment. "Thanks for waiting."

"Anything for you, babe," Zen winks, and you manage to stop yourself in time from rolling your eyes. The actor's expression then suddenly changes to one of seriousness as he speaks again, "Actually, I know that person."

"Y-You do?" you feigned surprise.

Zen offers a wry smile as he responds, "It's complicated." You bite back the sarcastic and mocking laugh that bubbled in your chest. If only Zen knew how absolutely complicated your entire situation was... What he said next completely throws you off, however. "I...I thought I loved her."

"Loved?" you repeat, confused. "Past tense...?"

"She isn't the one I loved," Zen answers vaguely, looking you in the eyes with an expression that just throws you further into confusion.

The actor then resumes walking, and you mechanically follow him and fall in step beside him. There was a silence in the air as you were deep in thought of what Zen just revealed to you. She wasn't the one he loved. 'She' was supposed to be 'you', so did that mean that Zen didn't really love 'you' then? Despite how desperately you tried to convince yourself that you and Mi-Suk were different people and how it was supposed to be Mi-Suk that Zen loved now, you can't help but get the wind knocked out of you at this new piece of information.

What you didn't know though was that Zen already knew that Mi-Suk and the 'you' that he chatted with on the messenger were different people. When he saw the confused and somewhat wary look that Mi-Suk gave him, it just confirmed everything he knew about the situation. She wasn't you. Even though her body is the one that Zen once associated with the 'you' that he loved, he knew that 'you' were no longer there.

But even though Zen had no idea where 'you' were right now, he felt strangely at peace knowing that at the very least, he still had you. He stole a glance your way and subconsciously lessened the space between you two, almost brushing against one another's side. Meanwhile, you were far too deep in your thoughts that you never noticed how much closer Zen was to you than from before.

Mi-Suk was supposed to be 'you'. Zen loved 'you' who was supposed to be Mi-Suk. Therefore, Zen loved Mi-Suk. That was how you thought it was supposed to be, but the young man just admitted he didn't love Mi-Suk. And if Mi-Suk was supposed to be you then that means that Zen didn't love you...? At least, that's how you interpreted it.

You inwardly groaned, your head slowly starting to hurt from trying to make sense of everything. Who does Zen love then?


	9. Realization

The words that Zen said about his feelings towards Mi-Suk are still ringing throughout your head even late at night. You really should try to sleep, but your mind was racing with so many questions that you couldn't relax for even just a second. Sighing heavily to yourself, you take an extra pillow from your bed and hug it, turning to your side as you debate on your next course of action. Words stumble out of your lips without much thought as you go through different scenarios and conversations you could try to have with the young man. The ringing of your cell phone cuts through your thoughts, and you hastily sit up to retrieve the device, afraid that it was something important if the person was calling you this late at night.

Your eyes widen for a second when you look at the caller ID and answer the call, bringing the phone close to your ear. "Hello?"

"Hey," Zen's familiar voice greets you from the other side. His voice is low and almost out of breath as though he was holding it up until the moment you picked up. "Sorry to call you so late. Were you sleeping?"

"No," you answer as you allow yourself to flop back down on the bed, your mind wandering back to all those other nights you spent chatting with Zen on the phone in the late hours when you were still helping the RFA host the party. Your heart clenches at the memory, and you ball your free hand into a fist to distract yourself. "Is something wrong?" you question, sounding concerned. Was his ankle hurting? Was he upset? Did he hurt himself?

"Mm, not really," Zen hums. "I just wanted to hear your voice."

You almost choke on air from his blunt response. God, Zen was sending you way too many mixed signals right now. Or maybe you were just misinterpreting those signals. Either way, there was no room for doubt in what Zen said, his voice sounding completely genuine. "O-Oh?"

You hear the actor chuckle at your lame response, and for a second you wonder if he would be able to hear you scream into your pillow. "Actually, I, um...have a question for you. It's been on my mind for a while now..."

Zen's entire demeanour shifted, prompting you to become much more attentive, sitting upright. "Sure, what is it?"

The line remains quiet for a moment and you almost believe that the call dropped, but then you hear the young man take a deep breath. You don't think it was for you to hear, but you just barely catch him muttering, "Here goes nothing." Zen's voice is then back to being its normal volume on the phone as he starts, "You said that I reminded you of someone you liked, right?"

It doesn't take much scrambling on your part to remember just what it was that Zen was talking about. You nod your head before realizing that he wouldn't be able to see while on the phone, so you voice out your response. "Yes..." If you remembered correctly, that small breakdown of yours also had you admitting that you were still very much in love with the young man. Naturally, you were talking about Zen himself, but he didn't know that.

"So then..." Zen continues, and you hear his voice waver as his usual confidence isn't quite there. "Does that mean...if you still didn't have feelings for him, you might be able to have feelings for me? Y-You know, since I remind you of him, right? So that means I could be your...type...maybe...?"

Whatever remaining confidence Zen had completely died down as he trailed off with that last sentence. You were stunned silent, making your rapidly beating heart beat seem so much louder in your ears. You had to tell him. This was your chance, you thought. If you didn't tell Zen now, then you highly doubted you would get another chance. However, before you can even open your mouth to speak, Zen spoke again.

"I-I'm sorry, that was a weird question! Just forget I said anything. It's late, and I should let you sleep. Good night!"

And then he hung up. You stared at your phone, not knowing how you felt before groaning out loud, frustrated, as you buried your face into your pillows and thrashed your legs around. What the hell were you supposed to do now?!

* * *

Zen stared blankly at his phone, going over the previous short conversation. Ah, he felt like an idiot. An absolute idiot. The actor placed his phone on top of the bedside drawer before flopping himself down on his bed, his hair flying all around him. He buried his face into his pillow, unknowingly copying your actions, and screamed.

"Aaagh! I'm an idiot. An idiot! Idiot! Idiot! I'm a handsome idiot, but an idiot all the same!" he whined as he rolled around as much as his cast allowed him to on the bed.

At some point, Zen had stopped rolling and just lay on his back, arms spread wide at his side as he stared at his ceiling. This was really starting to kill him, but hell, if it was you, then maybe the actor wouldn't mind it too much. Zen remembered the absolute heartache you cried out to him when you explained why you were trying to avoid him that one time. He hated to admit it, but he could feel the deep love you felt for that man you talked about, whoever he was, and the actor couldn't help but feel jealous.

"That person sure is lucky..." Zen mused, lips twisting into a wry smile as he tried to will himself to sleep.

Thanks to his monstrous healing capabilities, Zen was able to take his cast off quite early. The actor felt so relieved and free now that he was out of the cast and no longer had to use crutches. He really should be more careful next time, but in all honesty, he would be more than willing to put himself in harm's way if it meant protecting you.

Zen was enthusiastically greeted by his fellow cast and crew members, a couple of them congratulating him on his speedy recovery and expressing their excitement to resume production. The young man was excited too, but for right now, he just wanted to see your face. Seeing you and your smile was one of the things Zen looked forward to every time he woke up ever since he started working on this production.

The actor spotted you across the room, helping with organizing the props since nobody wanted an incident like last time to happen again, and Zen excused himself to go up to you. As you were busy moving boxes around, you saw a flash of white from the corner of your eyes before you felt new hands take the heavy box that you were carrying.

"Zen! I'm glad you're all better now!" you exclaim, flashing him a warm smile which caused butterflies to dance in his stomach.

He returned the gesture, "Thanks. So, where should I put this?"

"Oh, just over there in the corner should be good."

Zen nodded before proceeding to place the box away. Your eyes watched him attentively, still confused as to why he asked you that one question last night. You had wanted to bring it up, but it didn't seem like the proper time for it.

The day passed by uneventfully, and neither you nor Zen really had the opportunity or courage to bring up the phone call from last night. Needless to say, the atmosphere between you two was awkward, but it didn't quite deter the two of you from just having fun and enjoying each other's company. The director had called for your help for something by the time Zen managed to catch himself a break, so he was left sitting all by his lonesome, bored out of his mind.

The actor's phone chimed with his ringtone, and curious, Zen picked it up. "Seven? What's up?"

"Just wanted to give you a progress report!" the hacker answered with his usual energetic voice.

Zen scrunched his eyebrows from confusion. "Progress report...on...?"

The young man heard Seven give an exaggerated sigh. "[Name]! I've almost tracked her down!"

"Oh, right," Zen surprised even himself with his less than enthusiastic response. Just then, the actor caught sight of you entering the room, and Zen continued, "Actually, Seven... it's fine."

"What?"

"You don't really need to track [Name] for me anymore," Zen explained as he stood up when he locked eyes with you. You reflexively smiled upon seeing the male and waved to him, and Zen waved back. From the other side of the phone, Seven could practically hear the actor's smile in his voice as he said, "I think I've fallen in love with someone else..."

Without another word, Zen ended the call, all grins as he approached you. It's true that the young man still felt something for the 'you' that he met on the messenger, but Zen couldn't deny the feelings that he held for you here now. It no longer mattered to him if you really were the person he met and fell in love with or not. All he knew was that he found your presence comforting and something he longed for.

Perhaps he was being greedy, and a part of him was afraid of scaring you away, but the pull you had on him was just far too strong to ignore. Before, when Zen imagined what his life would be like being beside the one that he loved, he first saw Mi-Suk's face, but now, all Zen could see was you. He can't even remember when you started to invade his thoughts and dreams, but it wasn't like he was complaining.

He loved the _you_ here and now, and that was all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter should be the last one for this fic which will then be followed by an epilogue.  
> Thanks for sticking through this far, and I know I kinda blitzed through these last few chapters, but hopefully you were still able to enjoy them!


	10. Once Again

Everything seemed to be going extremely wonderful for Zen. The production was running smoothly, and while it _was_ a bit tiring, it was also extremely fun for him. Zen loved the character he was playing, and it definitely showed in his work. The actor was able to move freely without his cast, and he was super energetic and cheerful which was rather infectious. There was no doubt about it, Zen thought to himself. You were the reason why everything was going so well and why he was in such a good mood as of late.

Both you and Zen have been able to become much closer and a bit more bold with your shameless flirting as time passed on. A wink. A smile. Light hand-holding. They were simple things, but the hidden intimacy behind each action was still there. But Zen still held himself back. He believed that you were still in love with that one person that you once admitted Zen reminded you of, but from what the young man understood, that relationship didn't end well.

Which meant he still had a chance. A chance to prove himself worthy of your love. Of course, the actor would never force himself on you if you didn't feel the same way as he did, but he at least needed to make an effort first. He would do it. He would make you realize his feelings for you and just how much he would shower you with his affection and how he would treat you if you ever reciprocated his love.

It started with simple compliments. He'd notice something different about you, whether it was the way you styled your hair or wore something new, and always comment on it. The actor thought it was cute, the way you'd smile with a small blush on your cheeks, knowing that someone took notice of your efforts. Zen would also give you small gifts every now and then. They weren't much, mostly just small trinkets or old belongings of his, but you treasured each and every single one of them. And then there was the way he would just treat you overall, always looking out for you and making sure that you were happy. As long as you were happy, then Zen would be too.

Eventually, he decided that it was time for him to share one of his most precious secrets, and he was going to tell you how he felt. He would confess to you the way you make his heart skip a beat every time he sees you. The way you lift up his spirit with just the thought of you alone. The way you made him feel the best he's ever had but also want to improve himself so that he could be a better person, worthy of you.

"Zen..." you start, your voice uncertain. "I, uh... Hmm... I don't know about this..."

You stare warily at the vehicle in front of you, brows stitching together. You've never rode on a motorcycle before, and frankly, you were _terrified_ of riding it, let alone getting on. In all honesty, Zen didn't want to take his motorcycle either, wanting to make sure that you were perfectly safe, but this was the only way.

"Babe, don't you trust me?" he asks, voice light and airy as he holds out the extra helmet towards you.

"I do!" you answer without hesitation. "I trust you with my entire being, Zen. You came running for me to save me before, so of course I trust you," you continue as you remember that time you were almost kidnapped by the hacker. That was what was on your mind when you said those words, but Zen seemed to think you were talking about that incident at work instead. You then pointed accusingly towards the motorcycle, "It's that _thing_ I don't trust."

The young man laughs at how serious you are about this, but he's serious about this too and doesn't back down. He safely perches the helmet onto the seat before walking up towards you, loosely wrapping his arms around your waist. There's still far too much distance between the two of you for his liking, but any more than this would be deemed inappropriate for just friends, Zen tries to reason as he holds himself back. The actor gazes down at you, staring into your eyes and just taking a moment to admire their beautiful colour. It suits you, he thinks.

"You'll be safe with me, I promise. I'll make sure to follow all the road rules and even go a bit slower just for you. I won't let anything bad happen to you, so won't you please accompany me?" Zen begs, hoping you would say yes this time.

Finally, you sigh in defeat, "Okay... But can I at least know where we're going?"

Zen beams at your response, flashing you a toothy grin. "It's a secret!"

The young man bounces excitedly on his feet like a little kid on the holidays, and you can't help but let your expression melt into a smile at the sight. Zen squeezes you against him for a quick second before taking your hand and guiding you back to the motorcycle. The young man tucks his ponytail away so that it wouldn't hit you during the ride as you place the helmet on. As soon as it's secured, he gets on the motorcycle with you behind him.

"Make sure you hold onto me tight," he warns, and you do.

You wrap your arms around the male's waist and interlock your fingers together. He tenses slightly at the feeling, and his heart races when you press yourself closer against his back. Zen takes a deep breath to control his nerves before starting the vehicle.

* * *

As soon as Zen stops his motorcycle on the base of what seemed to be a bit of an incline, you want to desperately hop off but can't seem to trust the feeling in your legs. You keep your arms tightly wound against the actor, prompting him to laugh.

"Babe, you can let go now," he says, taking off both his helmet and yours, and you could hear the amused smile in his voice. Reluctantly, you do so, and you carefully mount yourself off. You feel yourself falter, your legs like jelly, but as always, Zen was quick to catch you and help you regain your footing. "Too much?"

"I, uh... I'll get used to it eventually," you answer shakily.

Warmth travels to Zen's cheeks at the hidden promise in your words that you would continue riding with him, even in the future. A stupid grin forms on his face, and he buries his face in your hair to hide it. God, he loved you so much.

Once you get proper feeling back in your legs, Zen encloses his hand around yours and gently leads you up the incline. He walks slowly, giving you time to appreciate the beautiful scenery around you. The colours look so vibrant and beautiful as they surround you and the actor clad in white. With each step Zen takes, the faster his heart beats as he anticipates your reaction for what's to come. As soon as the two of you reach the top, you gasp.

You take your hand away from Zen's, excitedly running up to the railing to overlook the city. You know this place; you've only seen a photo once that Zen took, but you _know_ this place. Zen watches with pure adoration on his face as your eyes light up, smile absolutely radiant. A pleasant breeze passes by, tickling your cheeks, and you can't stop the delighted giggle that bubbles up in your chest.

"Zen...this place is beautiful," you breathe out when he walks to stand beside you.

"It is, isn't it?" Zen sighs as he leans against the railing with his arms. "It's a very special place for me."

You smile, pure joy and bashfulness evident on your features. "Thank you for sharing it with me."

"Of course, because you're special to me, too."

"Wh-What?"

You quickly turn your head towards Zen, surprised by his words. Slowly, he straightens himself up and turns his body so that he was looking at you properly, prompting you to do the same. Silence slips in the space between you two as you stare at each other, waiting for him to speak. The actor lifts up a hand and grasps onto the fabric of his jacket, slightly nervous. He takes a small gulp as he tries to look for the words.

It's strange and frustrating to him; he's played characters in love before. He's memorized scripts and lines of passionate declarations, but none of them seem to fit or work. None of them carry the same weight of Zen's deep love for you, but even if Zen was able to find the words he was looking for, they would only end up getting lost with the way you look at him.

The young man mentally berates himself for why he can't do something as simple as this. He was just telling you how he felt, not proposing. _Yet_ , Zen finds himself thinking of that word at the last minute before trying to chase the thought away. He was getting too far ahead of himself, but it was definitely an idea under consideration for later if this turned out well.

"Zen...?" you tentatively call out to the male, and he realizes that he had stayed quiet for too long.

He shakes his head to bring his attention back to the present and offers a small smile, reassuring you. The actor parts his lips to speak, but before he could even utter out a single sound, a loud ' _meow_ ' is heard coming from Zen's pocket, catching the both of you off guard. Immediately, the actor sneezes, and your hand flies up to your mouth to stifle your laugh. The meowing continues, almost like a ringtone, and Zen has difficulty trying to retrieve his phone while sneezing.

His eyes glance at his screen, and he groans from frustration. Zen gives you an apologetic smile and excuses himself for a moment, walking a bit further away, fingers deftly typing at the keys. Watching him from afar, you can't help but suspect that it was probably Seven messing with his phone. Your previous warmth disappears for a moment at the thought. Zen gives one final loud sneeze before burying his phone back inside his pocket, and after making sure he still looked presentable, he made his way back to you.

"Sorry," he sniffles a bit and groans. "It was work-related. Stupid Trust Fund jerk..."

Zen mutters out that last part, and you remember the deal that he and Jumin had. The young man looks pissed off, and he _was_. Everything was going perfectly, leading up to his confession before the two cat-loving freaks decided to interrupt him and ruin the moment. Now the mood was gone, and Zen couldn't help but feel grumpy about the whole thing.

All his negative emotions washed away, however, when he felt you reach for his hand. You smiled warmly at him, wanting nothing more than for him to smile. His expression softens, and you speak, "I'm sure Jumin means well, and I know that you know that too. Isn't that why you accepted his offer to do the cat food commercial in the first place?"

Zen sighs in defeat. "Yeah, I guess you're right, but..." He trails off.

 _Wait_ —

"How do you know about that?"

Your eyes widen at the mistake you made, and you instinctively retract your hand from Zen's, almost as though you were burned. You let your guard down, you realized. You were in complete bliss and were so lost in the moment that you completely let your guard down. Your mind raced for an excuse as Zen stared at you expectantly. "I-I... Y-You told me...?" You flinch from how unconvincing you sound and wish the ground would just swallow you whole.

"I really don't think I would ever bring up cats and-slash-or Jumin, two things I can't stand, when I'm around you," Zen answers, knowing himself full well. "The only ones who should know about that are those in the RFA. Are you—"

"I should go!" you blurt out, not allowing Zen to finish his question.

You turn on your heel, but the young man quickly catches your wrist, preventing you from taking a step further. You tremble underneath his touch, fear of rejection ebbing its way into your mind. You want to look at Zen, but you can't. The actor keeps his grip firm around you. He doesn't want to lose you or let you go. Not again. What you said just now confirmed all of his sneaking suspicions, and now that he was met with the truth, he wasn't going to let you go _ever_ again.

"I love you, and only you" Zen confesses, and you become frozen. "I don't care about our situation. What's important is my heart that's pounding right now. Please don't turn your eyes away and accept my heart."

Your eyes widen at the familiar words, and you hesitantly look up at him, tears threatening to spill. Zen sees this and he's quick to pull you closer towards him, cupping your cheeks. He stares at you with the same gaze as he did back then. ...No, he's been looking at you with that familiar gaze all this time, hasn't he? You just never realized it. Zen stares at you, and you hear the silent plea in his eyes for you to answer him.

"I..." you pause, having to take a moment to breathe. "I love you, too. I won't go anywhere. I'll stay with you, so..."

Zen's hold on your cheeks tighten the slightest bit at your words that once belonged to him when he first admitted his feelings for you, and he can feel his eyes start to sting with tears of joy. It was you. It really _was_ you. Zen felt as though his heart was going to explode at any second now from the overwhelming feelings in his chest.

"Do you..." you speak again, struggling to find the words. "Do you really feel the same way towards me as you did back then? Even though I look like this?"

"I do," Zen answers without a moment to waste. That's all he says before he dips his head down and captures your lips. You gasp from the suddenness of it, and you choke back on a sob at the overflowing emotions in the kiss. Zen easily drinks in the sound, pressing his lips against yours much more firmly. Desperately. Passionately.

You decide to finally open up the cage in your heart, hands flying to wrap around his neck to pull the actor deeper into you. A small moan spills out from Zen as he tightens his hold around you, your bodies perfectly flushed against one another with not a single shred of space between you two. There has been too much distance between the two of you for far too long, and you each try to make up for it with this kiss, silent promises of more to come lying underneath it.

You take a small gasp for air when you finally part before Zen takes your lips once more, just as passionate as before. He kisses you over and over again as he murmurs against your lips.

"I love you."

Another kiss.

"I fell in love with you..."

Lips lock back together.

"Not because of appearance..."

Another capture of his mouth against yours.

"But because of who you are as a person."

Your heart swells with each word he utters, feeling every single emotion behind them. "Zen..."

The actor decides to finally stop assaulting your kiss-swollen lips and rests his forehead against yours. He stares at you with half-lidded eyes, face flushed. "You're beautiful, you know that? Definitely my type." A giggle escapes your lips, and Zen smiles, rubbing your noses together as his eyes crinkle with joy. He sighs blissfully, "This isn't a dream, right? If it is, I don't ever want to wake up..."

"Neither do I," you admit bashfully.

Zen buries his face in the crook of your neck and makes a strangled sound of restrained joy before looking back up at you with wonder. "God, I can't even remember how many times I've fallen in love with you now. When you first joined the RFA. When I thought you were somebody else who just shared the same name. And again... No, I've probably fallen in love with you more times than that. Every new thing I learned about you, I fell in love with you all over again."

Zen pauses, stroking your cheek, and you lean into his warmth. "And I'll continue falling in love with you again and again for the rest of my life."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one more chapter (epilogue), and then this fic will come to an end!


	11. Epilogue

For the umpteenth time since you've arrived just outside the corporate heir's penthouse with Zen right beside you, you couldn't help but fiddle with and pick at the fabric of your outfit. This doesn't escape Zen's notice, and he feels the need to voice his concern, albeit slightly amused. The actor carefully places an arm around your shoulder while he leans his head down to kiss your temple. "Babe, there's no need to be so nervous. You've met everyone at the RFA party already before."

Your hands finally stop with their actions, instead opting to twiddle your fingers as you let out an impatient groan, "I _know_ , but that was when I was in Mi-Suk's body. ...Do I look okay?"

Your voice wavers just the slightest bit, and Zen's eyes soften as he answers with an adoring smile, "You look as gorgeous as always." You mirror his expression, abashed, before Zen continues, lightly tracing his fingers around your neck and collarbones. "Especially with those pretty little red marks on your skin," he whispers, teasing you.

Your eyes widen at his added comment while your hands shoot up to the exposed skin, and Zen can't stop himself from laughing at your reaction. "Oh god, are they really still that noticeable?" you ask, your voice having gone up in pitch and warmth pooling in your cheeks. "I made sure to put extra effort into hiding them with make-up. Zen, it's all your fault!"

The young man continues to laugh, actually having to hold his sides before you smack his arms, completely serious. "I was just having fun, babe. It's fine; you can't see them." You narrow your eyes at your boyfriend, uncertain as to how you should react to his teasing. Zen then adds, "But you know, I _am_ a bit sad..."

"About what?"

The actor sighs dramatically, pulling you closer against him by your hips. "I really wanted everyone to know that you belong with me. Those marks were supposed to be proof of that."

"I'm pretty sure they know that already," you roll your eyes, not knowing what you were expecting him to say. But then you look up at the young man through your lashes and give a coy smile. "If you're still unsure about that though, we _could_ always do this..."

You grab Zen's coat by the collar and pull him down closer to you, catching him completely off guard as you firmly press your painted lips against his. You pull away with an audible ' _smack_ ' from your lips and leave Zen standing there, frozen and dazed which prompts you to giggle. You softly run your thumb across his slightly parted lips. "There," you smile in satisfaction. "Now our lips match."

You reach inside your pocket for your phone and hastily take it out to take several pictures of your boyfriend's _extremely_ flushed face, neck, and ears. Zen stutters profusely, trying to find words, and you feel great for being able to get back at him for teasing you. A surprised shriek escapes you, however, when you feel yourself being pulled forward, only to have Zen crash his lips with yours once more.

You laugh sweetly into the kiss, leaning forward to press yourself closer against him before a deep voice clears their throat, reminding you of just where you were. Your eyes snap open, and you immediately try to pull away, embarrassed for having been caught, but Zen cups your cheeks and continues kissing you without a care in the world.

"Zen," Jumin's familiar voice reaches your ears as he tries to talk with the actor. "I would appreciate it if you could keep yourself in check and be intimate in a private room instead."

Your eyes widen even more when you realize that Jumin just told Zen in his own business-like way to "get a room". You _know_ that Zen heard the older male but merely chose to ignore him, instead deciding to deepen his kiss with you even more and to offer an exaggerated moan, perhaps out of spite. A part of you wants to scream from embarrassment, but another part of you is also rather amused by the whole situation and wants to see how it all plays out.

You could hear Jumin sigh before he says, "I'm going to go get Elizabeth 3rd."

Zen immediately pulls away, slightly breathless as he turns to glare at the corporate heir. "You _always_ have to ruin the mood, don't you?" Despite his words, Zen doesn't sound the least bit spiteful—lightly annoyed, maybe—and you can't help but smile at how the two seem to be much friendlier towards one another than when you first joined the RFA.

This time, it's Jumin's turn to ignore Zen as the corporate heir turns to you and offers a hand out for you to take, calling you by your name. "Though I can't make any scientific sense of this whole situation, I understand that this is what people might say is the 'true you', so allow me to say that it's a pleasure to meet you again."

You smile towards Jumin, face still flushed as you take his hand and shake it. "Likewise."

The older male then gestures for both you and Zen to step inside his penthouse where the other RFA members were waiting for the both of you. After your confession with Zen at his secret spot, he had convinced you to meet up with the other members, understanding full well just how much you must have missed them. Each and every single one of them missed you too, so when Zen tried to explain the situation to them as best as he could, they were very quick and more than eager to agree to all meet up at Jumin's penthouse to formally welcome you into the RFA once more.

A familiar-looking blond looked up from the game he was playing when he hears the commotion from the door, grin plastered on his face as he got up and bounded his way over to you. "Ah, [Name], right?" Yoosung sounds very excited as he greets you and gives you a friendly hug before pulling away and lightly bounces on his feet. "You look even cuter than before!"

"Yoosung, that's mean to Mi-Suk," you comment about the female you kept in touch with and managed to befriend, though you know that he meant no ill-will.

Yoosung gasps when he realizes what you mean, and he whines defensively, "Ah, I didn't mean it like thaaat!"

You laugh at him for a moment before bringing your attention over to the young woman who approached you. You smile warmly at the assisstant, and she easily returns it as she glances between you and Zen. "The two of you look like the perfect couple together," Jaehee comments.

At that, Zen places an arm around your waist and grins widely, "We sure do, don't we babe?"

"Thank you Jaehee," you choose to ignore Zen's comment, and the actor purses his lips into a pout, much to both your and Jaehee's amusement.

Soon afterwards, you and Zen excuse yourself to greet the red-head hacker who seems to be typing away on his personal laptop. When he hears footsteps approach him, Seven looks up from his screen, his fingers still continuing to tap away at the keys. The young man smiles widely at the two of you before looking at Zen accusingly, "You really wasted my time, Zen. Making me look for [Name] when she was right beside you this entire time."

"I didn't know!" the actor raises his hands in defense, and Seven merely shrugs before turning his attention towards you.

"Congratulations!" he beams, and you tilt your head in confusion.

"Thanks...?"

The hacker finally decides to stop typing. "I'm glad that you got your true happy ending as yourself and not as some default avatar," Seven adds, flashing you a knowing wink as your eyes widen a fraction at his words. You don't get a chance to respond before Seven brings his attention back to his laptop, and you _know_ that he was never going to bring it up again. ...But that was fine; you didn't need to know.

Once you finally introduce yourself to everybody a second time, the welcoming celebration finally starts. As expected of Jumin, there's all sorts of expensive-looking food laid out which both you and Yoosung eye with keen interest. Both you and Jaehee talk about the production that you and Zen worked together in and promise to see it together at least three times. Jumin later came up to you, thanking you for the positive impact you've had, not with just Zen, but also with the rest of the RFA. Seven seems to be busy with something, so you rarely got to talk with him but did manage to sneak in a few shared laughs here and there.

Everybody seems to be lost in their own little thing while you take a moment to catch your breath after all the socializing you were doing before familiar strong arms wrap themselves around you from behind. You offer a small hum in greeting towards your boyfriend as you close your eyes, leaning back against him.

"How is it?" Zen asks, hoping that you're enjoying yourself.

"A lot of fun," you answer with a blissful sigh.

The actor lets out a satisfied sound at your response, tightening his grip around you. "...Thank you."

"For...?"

"For coming into our lives," Zen breathes out. "You've made your way into our hearts so easily and so quickly; I don't think you'll ever be able to understand just how _grateful_ we are to you and just how _special_ you are to all of us. We love you just as much as you love us, if not more, so thank you for loving us."

Zen then guides your body to turn around to face him, and you find yourself blushing from the way he looks at you. His hands lightly trace over the sides of your body as he leans down and whispers quietly against your lips, "Thank you for loving me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, I'm finally done! Thank you so much for all the support and those who followed this story with enthusiastic interest! Admittedly, there were many times I wanted to drop this story due to lack of feedback and out of uncertainty, but I'm really glad that I decided to stick through and finish it. Now, you see, I _could_ have made the ending an angst one instead, but in the end, I decided to give you readers the happy ending you deserved.  
>  I hope you all enjoyed! Feel free to strike up a conversation with me on my [Tumblr](http://avistella.tumblr.com/)!


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